Hulk Smashed…Marvel Universe Online Cancelled

We’ve been hearing rumors about its demise and finally word came down from on high that Marvel Universe Online has been given the Axe. You can read all the details over at MTV, but basically it all boiled down to money. Microsoft and Marvel both felt they couldn’t suckle on the bosom of their fans enough, so they called it quits.

muo no

I have to say, I’m awfully bummed out about the whole deal. As both a fan of Cryptic Studios and Marvel, I was excited for the possibility of a Superhero MMO on the 360.  It’s also real disappointing that this game got the ax for business reasons and not developmental issues. I could have accepted it if the game just didn’t come together, but to kill it because you didn’t know how to World of Warcraft money is pretty shitty.

Next time fellas, if you’re going to shit can a game, at least let us know when the rumors hit and not 4 months after the fact.

Oh well, at least now Cryptic can focus on their Unnamed MMO  and maybe Marvel can look to finding another studio to make their fighting game since EA Chicago bit the big one last year. In the mean time, everybody back to City of Heroe / Villains.


The Future Beat Down of an Unknown Fighter

Brock Lesnar
Courtesy of MMA Weekly 

As many of you might know at UFC 81 Brock Lesnar had only his second MMA fight and only his first in the UFC. He came out like a beast and quickly took, the one time champion, Frank Mir down. The fight looked as if it might end right there with Lesnar on top pummeling Mir with a barrage of punches. That would all end when Lesnar threw an inadvertent punch to the back of Mir’s head. Referee Steve Mazzagatti then stopped the fight and gave Lesnar a point deduction for the punch. It seemed as if there was no warning ever called during the fight to let Lesnar know of what he had done and to warn him of further action.

According to an interview with Steve Mazzagatti said that he did issue a warning to Lesnar for punches earlier in the round. Mazzagatti continued to say that he did have issues hearing because it was so loud in the arena. He admitted that he was unable to “hear myself give the warning” on the video. Now I understand that hearing Mazzagatti on the video and Lesnar hearing him in the ring are two different things, but I want to know is WHEN does Mazzagatti issue the warning. He said that it was after the first barrage of hits he issued the warning and the second was when he deducted the points. Now I have seen this fight multiple times and only see one time when he Lesnar punches Mir in the back of the head. I believe that the deduction was not warranted and Mazzagatti got the call wrong.

Once the fight restarted Lesnar took Mir down once again, but this time Mir was prepared and had cleared his head from the barrage. Lesnar then left his leg behind and was defeated by a leg lock. Mazzagatti got the call wrong, but it did not cause for Lesnar to lose the fight. Lesnar lost the fight because he is still inexperienced.

That will not be the case for his next fight. At the moment his next fight is still yet to be announced as well as his next opponent. Who ever this next opponent is I feel extremely sorry for this person. Lesnar is only going to get bigger, stronger, and faster before his next fight. Most of all he has gained experience in the UFC and now has more to prove. He has proved that he is not the former WWE actor/fighter, but he is a bona fide MMA fighter. He will use this loss to fuel himself to be a better fighter; he has said that this is his passion.

The next opponent better come into to his fight with Lesnar prepared for a knock down, dirty, nasty fight. Lesnar is no joke; people need to see that he is only going to be better his next time around. His next opponent better know what he is getting into. Lesnar will make his next opponent an example of just how dangerous he can be. Lesnar is a beast and he will cause someone serious harm if they are not prepared for him. Lesnar is a two time NCAA wrestling champion, he knows how to come back from losses and how to use them to his advantage. Lesnar is seriously one of the most dangerous fighters in the UFC heavyweight division and he only has two fights under his belt. His skills are raw and unprocessed, but give him some quality mat time with a decent trainer and in a short period of time he WILL be destroying people. He is going to beat his next opponent into the ground and stomp his way up the heavyweight ladder.

Mark my words, one day he will be the UFC Heavyweight Champion.

Geek Theorist : Indy 4

Leaked images and plot spoilers have become almost commonplace on the internet these days. Almost daily the interwebs are inundated with all kinds of spoilers on flicks like Cloverfield and the Dark Knight. It’s getting to the point where one can pretty much piece together what the movie is going to be about, without ever seeing it. So with that in mind, I have taken it upon myself, as a Geek Theorist, to piece together the plots of these films so that you, the viewer, don’t have to waste your time trying to cobble it all together.

This week I’m going to be taking a look at Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.

First, let’s start with all the evidence to date. Aintitcool News has posted a couple of spoiler images like this one of the crystal skull and another pic at of Indy in a very familiar looking warehouse. Couple that together with some plot spoilers that indicate Indy is mucking around at Area 51 and a very interesting picture begins to form.


Could Indy ending throwing down with some Alien baddies? Well, considering the past Indy flicks I’d have to say no. So then what is the possible relation between Indy, an alien crystal skull and the warehouse that houses the Ark of the Covenant?

It is all so simple it is almost foolish. Consider if you will that all two Indiana Jones flicks have been about uncovering relics central to the Christian Faith. The Ark of the Covenant and the Holy Grail. I think if we consider all angles of this the answer is so astounding that it is blasphemous.

I believe that the major twist of Indiana Jones 4 is this: The Crystal Skull is that of Jesus Christ!!

alien jesus

That’s it my friend, Jesus was an alien and the Ark of the Covenant was some kind of Alien Death Machine and the Communists want the skull so that they can destroy Christianity and thus America. HA!

No need to thank me. I’ll be vindicated when we all see the new Indy trailer drop with the Spiderwick Chronicles. Until then, stay up to date on all things Indy 4 at the Unofficial Crystal Skull Fan Page.

And just remember, this is only one geek’s theory.

JRPG goodness arrives, Lost Odyssey lands next week!

I haven’t really dug into a good Japanese RPG since Final Fantasy X, and with Lost Odyssey only a week away, from what I’ve seen and heard about the game I can’t help but get excited to play through what looks to be an epic game. Right off the bat from when they first showed the game and it displayed the main character as an immortal bad ass just going Highlander on every enemy soldier in sight and not pulling any punches when it comes to visual depiction of violence, I had a feeling this game had that “it” that other games simply lack. And judging from how the game has progressed and the initial reviews that I’ve read about the game, it is definitely looking like something that RPG fans and 360 fans should keep on the radar.

One of the things that appealed to me immediately about this game, is the art direction. Sakaguchi is really hearkening back to that FFVI and FFVII era art style, with the just the right melding of medieval style with technological advances, and now with some next-gen power, the locales and characters have this great realization to them that to me, being a huge fan of the earlier Final Fantasy’s, Sakaguchi must have been dreaming of crafting back in the 90’s. And with legendary Square-Enix composer Nobuo Uematsu creating the score for the title, simply the video’s of the game that I’ve seen give me huge nostalgia trips to the early Final Fantasy days.


While reviews of the game have admitted that Lost Odyssey in no way reinvents the JRPG formula when it comes to item management and battle, the tweaks that it does make such as the timed battle hits, party formation and defense gauge along with ring customization and skill building add enough depth to keep the gameplay from getting stale. But with great graphics and sound, mature characters with relevant stories that don’t act as if they were just pulled out of high school, enough changes to the turn based gameplay to keep it fresh, battles that force you to think and use strategy (grinding apparently does not work in this game, enemies level up with you thank God) and the 1,000 years of dreams stories to add more narrative depth, Lost Odyssey appears to be producing a pretty good bench mark for other JRPG’s to come, and I can’t wait til the 12th to go and pick this one up.

The Crying Game

There is an online petition going on at the moment to get the NFL to review the last 100 seconds of the Superbowl.  Don’t believe me? Go to this site. and you will see how sad people can be at times.  Your team lost, get over it.  I guess the videotapes didn’t help much this time?  WHY?!?!?! WHY would anyone sign this petition?  The Giants played a superior game, and won.  Simple as that.  No conspiracy theories, no “what ifs,” no “Gisele was at the stadium and that caused Tom Brady to play bad.”  Gisele was not to blame.  


Who’s to blame for the end of the perfect season?  Maybe it was the Giants defense?  Maybe if the Giants hadn’t put Brady on his back all game the Patriots would have won. If only Bellichick had taken the field goal.  Cocky bastard believed he can get away with anything.  He’s been caught cheating and now he’s been embarrassed at the Superbowl.  No sweeter revenge can come to fruition.  


And now a word to the fans who actually signed this petition.  What are you complaining about?  Your team benefited from multiple calls on the field and you lost it.  Don’t blame the NFL for some wrongdoing that never happened.  Grab your muskets and find Bellichick.  He lost the game for you.  So cry cry all you want.  It’s not like you have an  All-Pro quarterback, who’s only 30 by the way, 3 Superbowl victories in the last 7 years, and most likely, another visit to the Superbowl next year?  So what do you have to cry about?  Oh wait, thats right.  Your team got beat by the New York Giants.  Don’t forget to grab some tissue on the way out.



Trailer Trash: Superhero Movie

Superhero Movie

Please take a moment to watch this trailer:

Superhero Movie Trailer

Don’t worry… you’re not the only one feeling that pain. It hurts to see trash like this made. At first, the idea was new, and granted; it had its fair share of laughs. But enough is enough with these movies. The horse has been long dead and buried, no more need to beat it. How can you take a movie and just make it bad? The movie being spoofed was bad enough, it didn’t need Drake from that damn kids show to make it any worse. It’s hard enough to find superhero movies that are good. With the recent craptacular amounts of bad superhero movies, there’s no reason to spoof them. If you want a real laugh, watch Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer, or even Spiderman 3. I know for damn sure I had quite the laugh watching them.

The longer a movie series drags on, the worst it gets. It’s almost inevitable. I put it solely on the directors shoulders to make quality movies. Yes the writer, producers and all that crap play a role as well. But honestly, I BLAME YOU SAM RAIMI for ruining Spiderman. He managed to turn the “friendly neighborhood Spiderman” into an emo fruitcake loving douchebag. And we all know what to do with emos… beat them to a bloody pulp.

Back to the topic on hand, I am beyond tired of seeing trailers for these “movie” movies. Whether it be Scary Movie, Date Movie, or any other crap these writers think of. Stop these movies from being made. Do something NEW and ORIGINAL. STOP TAKING SCRIPTS FROM OTHER MOVIES, PUT A JOKE IN IT AND CALLING IT YOUR OWN!! The horse is dead… let it rest in peace.

So you want to go to a comic convention?

As the first major con of the year, Wonder Con, approaches on the horizon I feel it is important to provide some of my fellow geeks with some simple do’s and don’ts to survive the con season.
Stormtrooper Elvis

1. Comfortable Shoes – This is probably the most important piece of advice I can give anybody going to a con. I imagine some of you are of the hearty, husky variety so it is especially important to show your tootsies some love as you plod the convention floor. Even if you’re dressed up like Red Robin, you should still rock some comfy cross trainers when you are working the floor. If you have the chance, I would recommend hiring a small asian boy to ferry you about the floor in a rickshaw, but it is rather pricy.

2. DEODORANT!!– This one point has been beaten to absolute death, but it is still relevant. There’s going to be thousands of the unwashed masses wandering from booth to booth in bemused wanderlust, and that can equal quite a lethal stench. If I had to describe it, the smell is somewhere between a Cambodian Mass Grave and a decommissioned slaughterhouse. So please, for the sake of all of those around you, slap on some Old Spice and make Bruce Campbell happy.

3. Be prepared for swag – At the con, people are going to be throwing all kinds of advertising knick-knacks and swag your way, so it would be a good idea to bring some kind of bag to contain it all. Fortunately, lots of booths will supply you with baggage to contain your epic loot, but if you feel you need the extra space, it would probably be a good idea to bring a backpack to store any valuables you may purchase.

4. Bring your own food – Convention food is always pricey and if you don’t want to waste time finding some local place to eat, pack your own supplies. A nice sandwich, some chips, oreos, a couple of bottles of water and a monster and you are set for the day. Of course, if you aren’t a porker like myself you can always pack less….AT YOUR OWN PERIL!!!

5. Make sure to hit up the Small Booths – While it is always super sweet to swing by the Marvel and DC Comics booths, don’t forget that there are a lot of indy people their wares. At last year’s Comic Con, I passed by a small booth for a group called the Stunt People and after some casually chatting picked up two of their films. It was probably the best purchase I made at the Con and I’m now a fan. The moral of the story being, take a chance and show some love to the guys trying to get their foot in the door.

6. Don’t be a Fanboy – I get it, you can’t believe what Bendis is doing to the Marvel Universe and now that he’s coming to town you want to give him a piece of your mind. But seriously, that’s what the internet is for. These people are taking time out of their lives to come and share their love of the medium with the fans. It’s pretty awesome, so don’t ruin it by trying to bitch out somebody because you don’t like how they are running shop.

7. Talk to the Creators – On the flip side of number 5, remember this is an awesome opportunity to talk to the creators of your favorite comics. What other entertainment medium gives you that kind of opportunity? Make sure you take it, if you have the chance tell Joss Whedon you love what he did on Astonishing X-Men. But once again, if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all. What would Thumper’s Mom say?

8. Let your Geek flag fly – This is one of those rare opportunities to share your love for comics with thousands of others. Don’t be bashful. Co-mingle with people. Dress up as your favorite character, we all get it. If you see somebody with a kickass Green Lantern T-shirt, don’t be afraid to give them a compliment.

I hope these tips have been in someway, helpful, but most importantly, just remember to have fun. How many times in your life can you see Superman and Spidey eating a hot dog at the concession stands?